Finally, an update!!

It just occurred to me that it's been 2 weeks since I've been on here!! Time has flown. Admittedly, I've spent most of that time asleep and at work LOL I come home exhausted every day, and have a nap... sometimes up to 2 hours. And I don't feel the slightest bit bad about taking that time for myself, because I've really been putting in a big effort this year to make sure I take care of myself.

I think things are going well!! I'm now 9 weeks and 2 days. Haven't put any weight on yet, despite eating about 6 times a day. But I think my shape is changing, despite the scales not agreeing with that. I feel kinda fatter. Can't wait until my bump pops out!!

Right now the whole pregnancy thing kinda feels surreal. I don't talk about it that much, cos it's not general knowledge yet. And we haven't had any tests or appointments since the 7 week scan. I guess when we had weekly bloods, and the ultrasound, and the appointment with the RE, it kept everything feeling more real, and progressing. Now I've been left kinda on my own, which is sort of scary. I think I really liked them keeping a close eye on how everything was going. Maybe that's because I've had a missed miscarriage in the past, and I'm dying to know what's happening in my uterus!!

My next appointment is next Friday, with my obstetrician. I'll be a little over 10 weeks. I'm excited to go back and see him!! We get along really well, he's been there with us for our whole journey over the last 4 and a bit years, so it's nice to go to his office with good news for a change. I'm also kinda excited and shit scared at the same time, about his little ultrasound machine. Believe me, I'm absolutely DYING to see the little Bean again. But also kinda scared of Dr J's machine, as it didn't find anything but an empty sac last time. Irrational I know, but hey, that's just me.

There's been a couple of rumours going around work that I'm 'also' pregnant. I kept a totally straight face when one of the girls confronted me about it, and I'm positive she believed that I'm not actually pregnant. Another girl told me that my boobs look bigger (Sorry, what? I didn't realise you'd taken an interest...) As there are about 200 girls on staff in the nursery I work in, it's not suprising when a bunch of girls get pregnant all around the same time. Kinda inconvenient for me, cos it starts everyone talking about pregnancy, and speculating about who's going to be next. I've been asked more than once if it will be me that's next... I can't wait to reveal it to everyone, but I'm still too cautious to say anything before the 12 week scan.

As far as symptoms go, I haven't had much in the way of nausea. That's nice, and I'm kinda happy, but a bit of nausea would make me feel more confident about the little Bean! Some smells make me gag, and brushing my teeth makes me gag (almost made me vomit the other day) but feeling fine in between time, apart from tired and hungry as usual. Getting a few more pimples now too, is that my skin's idea of glowing??

Well, I think that's about it for today. I really will get my butt into gear and post more often, I want a record of how I'm feeling and how everything's going, and NOT posting is not accomplishing that!!

Hello to all my friends in blogland... I've been trying to catch up with all your blogs, and if I haven't commented yet, I promise it will be soon. Even if just to say hello :)

Introducing....

Measuring perfectly for gestation (7 weeks) and with a gorgeous little heart beating at 132bpm, it's...

My baby!!!!

Can't describe how happy, relieved and excited I am!!

Was feeling only midly nervous on the way there, but the time I got into the ultrasound office, I was sweaty (palms and armpits - ew), I could feel my heart rate was racing, and my legs were turning to jelly. Thank goodness DH was there to hold my hand!

I really liked the ultrasound lady's form, she went straight to the baby and showed us it's little heart beating, before she moved on to the other bits like measuring my ovaries and checking other things. When she measured my ovaried, she asked if they'd gotten a lot of eggs out... are they still stretched??

She also asked me if I'd had some bleeding, and measured something next to the gestational sac. I asked Dr W about it afterwards, (he didn't have the ultrasound report yet) and he said it sounded like a [insert medical terminology here that I've already forgotten the name of] which is quite common and is usually behind the gestational sac, and causes some bleeding. So maybe that's been my little trouble maker, hmmmm.

Dr W also said that my hormone levels were quite high, and asked if there were one or two in there... a question that my friends have been asking for some time!! Well, there's only one that we know about!! Which is just fine with me, I am over the moon with one strong little one.

Dr W said that he was not suprised that this one took. That when he did the transfer, he thought "Yep, that's the one." He thinks I'll have to stay on the aspirin until about 20 weeks, but that he'll leave that decision to Dr R, my regular obstetrician. And I don't have to come back and see Dr W until we're ready to the FET.

That must be the best part of their job, he was almost as radiant as we were!

I am in awe of this little being that's inside me. I can't stop looking at the pic!! I already made copies of it, so I can put one in my purse, and give some to the grandparents :)

Nearly ultrasound time...

6 weeks and 4 days today, creeping ever so much closer to the ultrasound date!! I wish it was closer, I think it was supposed to be right about now, but of course it's the weekend, how inconvenient!!

Had a little spotting again on Friday at work, but apart from that all seems fairly settled. Still taking it easy... I've spent the last couple of weekends sitting around on the couch, mostly watching movies or tv, trying to just rest up so as not to disturb the baby. Hopefully it's working.

I find myself swinging between feelings of 'everything's fine' and being happy, and then stressing and worrying about bleeding or something else going wrong. I think I've kept a lid on it pretty well. I'm trying to keep the negative thoughts away in case the baby catches a hint of them, but I can't help them creeping into my head sometimes, especially when I feel a twinge, or have a spot.

I've also realised that I'm shit scared of my pregnancy calendar. You know those blank calendars you get, with the stickers to mark in different occasions, and you have to fill in all the dates until you're due, and it gives you advice and little spots to fill in blanks? I can't bring myself to fill it in yet. I got it out of my wardrobe, and read all the little bits, and checked out the cute stickers. But I can't fill it in yet. I have filled in one or two before, and ended up having to throw them out cos of course they're covered in irrelevant dates then. I don't want to go through all the effort and then have to throw out another one. Maybe after Thursday I will make a start on it.

We have our ultrasound appointment Thursday at 1.45pm (I will be 7 weeks and 1 day) and then our appointment with Dr W at 4pm. I told DH that we can go to the Italian restaurant down the road in between for a late, hopefully celebratory, lunch in between appointments.

Turns out DH is going to have to meet me at the ultrasound appointment. He'll have to work in he morning, and then meet me there straight from work. I'm kinda annoyed about that, even though I know I shouldn't be. Having a 6-7 week ultrasound without freaking out is not exactly my forte! I know from past experience that my heart will probably be racing and my palms will undoubtably be sweating up a storm. I usually make DH drive to ultrasound appointments, cos my hands will be slipping off the steering wheel!! Hopefully I will cope better than usual this time. We will find out on Thursday I guess.

Quick update...

Just a quick one!! Cos I'm really tired after work, and starving hungry as usual, only time for a quick update before I run away to cook dinner!!

Had my bloods today, and beta hcg was good again... 31,131!! I have never ever had a beta that high, so pretty excited... finally starting to feel more real now, and a little more comfortable about it. I put my numbers into my babymed graph, but it only goes to 24 days, so my line would actually extend another few days to the right.... did that make any sense??
My nurse called with the results this afternoon, and kinda said goodbye! She said that this was the last time she would be calling me with results, and I don't have to come back to the clinic. My progesterone level was lower than last time, which she said would explain the spotting on the weekend, but still within the normal range. Now only 7 days until we get to 'meet' the little bubba at the ultrasound!!! I go back to see Dr W on the same afternoon, a couple of hours later, and then I think I'll be officially discharged back to my usual obstetrician... things are moving in the right direction!! I'm still nervous, and will definitely feel a lot more confident after the ultrasound, but things all seem to be going the right way, so that definitely helps!

OK I'm off to cook some dinner! Take care out there in blogland x

Just a quick, spotty update!

OK so I continue to have about 3 spots a day. Just once a day. Just enough to freak me out once a day when I pee.

It's not fresh. I'm not crampy.

I rang my nurse coordinator this afternoon, just for advice. I thought I should probably just give her a head's up, even if it's nothing.

And that's exactly what she thinks it is.

She said she's not concerned, but to let her know if it becomes fresh, or I start getting cramps. In the meantime, carry on, business as usual. Bloods scheduled for Thursday as planned. She said that because I have spotted a little (which is quite common) my progesterone might be a little low, and if it is, I'll go back on some supplements.

Fine with me!!

To be honest, when I stopped the progesterone, I kinda felt like they'd left me to do this all on my own now... where did my training wheels/wings go??? I'm not so sure I can ride/fly by myself!!!!

So, we wait for Thursday.

In the interim, I'm relaxing as much as possible. Clocking a good amount of couch hours.

Tonight I've sent DH out to get me my favourite noodles :)