And so it continues

CD 11 and still bleeding.

What?!?!

This is the complete opposite of what I expected from the BCP. And I am NOT loving this "down-regulation." I read on the BCP info leaflet that it can take your body 3 months to get used to it, and start having proper cycles. I do not remember that kind of carry-on when I first started taking the pill all those years ago... but then again, it was a long time ago, and a different pill...

DH is desperate for the bleeding to stop, I think the festive season has made him horny and he's dying to get some... isn't that sweet, after all these years of scheduled sex, and he still wants me!! lol

Oh well, I'm sure this is the easiest part of it all, and it surely can't last forever, right?

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I had tried to put my next appointment out of mind, cos it seemed so far away. But it's starting to creep up on me, and now it's only 8 days away! Yay!!! I never thought I would be so excited to see my Patient Co-ordinator, hand over a stack of cash, and get a bag of nasal spray and injections... but I really am :)


Oh, and I've pretty much decided that I will apply for the new position at work. It's a permanent Clinical Nurse Educator position, which is something I'd really like to do. And cos it's permanent, it will be there waiting for me when I return from maternity leave (hopefully next year). I don't know when another position will become available, so I think I should try for this one. If I don't get it, no big dramas.

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Hope everyone in the IF blogosphere has a very happy new and fertile new year!!!!!!!
Love and hope to you all
xxxx

And finally - Picture Tag

Wow, I really have been sitting in front of the computer for far too long today!! Making up for not being on here for the last couple of days!!!

OK so Just Another Infertile tagged me for a picture tag game. I guess I had better do my allocated 'homework' and follow the rules!! hehehe BTW she has just found out that she is PREGNANT so please head over and show her some love!!

Here are the rules of the game...

1) Choose the 4th folder where you store your pictures on your computer
2) Select the 4th picture in the folder
3) Explain the picture
4) Tag 4 people to do the same. NO CHEATING! (cropping, editing, etc!)

So here is my pic...
This is a photo of my cousin's daughter, Paige. Turns out that the 4th folder in my photo folder is the one where I keep all of the photos that my cousin emails me! She is their first child, and she's a little over 12 months old now. After having her, my cousin Louise has gone back to school to study nursing. Her husband Shaun (whose arm is in the shot) is a builder, they renovated their house last year.

Sorry it's not a very exciting photo!! Once again, I'm sure I will get a slap on the wrist, for not tagging anyone else, but oh well.... sorry!!

Tagged! - Random things

OK so I was tagged a couple times last week, and I haven't had a chance to complete the tasks!! Here is the first one...

I was tagged by Lea to post 7 random facts about myself.

Rules:
1. Link to the person who tagged you.
2. Share 7 random and/or weird facts about you.
3. Tag 7 random people at the end, and include links to their blogs.

Random facts...

1. All my friends call me G. My name is actually Mel. Afew years back when the movie "Ali G" was all the rage, one of the girls I worked with started calling me 'Melly G.' It stuck for awhile. But Australians hate to call each other by full names, we abbreviate everything, and 'Melly G' became 'G', which is what all my friends call me now. (Are you shocked, my name doesn't actually start with a G?)

2. I have 2 cats (DimSim and Tigger) and 2 dogs (Woody and Jessie).

3. I did ballet for 13 years when I was growing up.

4. My older sister is a witch. I'm a Catholic.

5. I no longer have an appendix. It ruptured in 2003, during the first week of my post graduate diploma.

6. I had never been in a plane until I was 18. The first plane ride I went on was when I went skydiving, so it was a little while longer before I actually landed in a plane.

7. I have been in love with Leonardo DiCaprio since I was in highschool... a little embarrassing! lol


I don't know a ton of people who blog, and those who do have already done this tag... is it cheating not to tag anyone??

I don't get it

Here's the thing. I've been on the BCP for 9 days now. And I assumed that, as I was starting to take it on day 1 of AF, it would be a short and light period.

But no.

I am usually a 3-4 day girl, and then maybe a bit of spotting for a couple days as a last hurrah. This month, with the BCP, I had a really heavy one for 5 days. And then a few days of spotting. And now, day 9, I'm kinda achy again, and the bleeding has increased. Is this normal?? Seriously, I want to know. And my clinic is closed until Jan 5.

It's starting to freak me out a little bit. I feel less suppressed than normal. Aren't I supposed to be all down regulated??? WTF is going on....




On a cheerier note, we had a fab christmas. The in-laws kids were actually bearable for a change at lunch, and my family all came over to ours for dinner and helped cook. My youngest cat Tigger, did bring in a mouse and dump it by the dining table just as we were dishing up, but apart from that everything went pretty smoothly!!

Hope everyone out there in the blogosphere had a good Chrissie, and cheers to a happy and fertile 2009!!

(Ooh BTW I promise I will post my tags very soon, haven't had a chance yet!)

Lovin my horoscope

Ooh what with my horoscope from the weekend, and my Tarot predictions, I can kinda see a theme developing here!!! lol I just hope that my body is tune with all this kharma!!!

OK me and all my good buddies had our annual Christmas party at A's house (she is now 14 weeks and still puking) It's a pretty big night for most of us, and we were sitting around outside the next morning eating breakfast on the patio (eggs, bacon and sausages on the bbq, with toast and hash browns). J starting reading out everyone's horoscopes, and I have gotta say that mine was easily the best!!! (This was my horoscope the day after starting BCP)


Capricorn:
You have lots of reasons to celebrate, now and well into the new year. Many plans are coming to fruition and tough times are behind you. You're entering a yearly personal pleasure peak; it could even be one of the best times of your life. You deserve it, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.


How good is it??

I'm trying so hard to find a good balance of excitement and positivity, and realistic-ness towards this cycle (I am aware that is not a word but hey). I think I'll stay positive and happy during the festive season, and then knuckle down with the reality once I start my drugs next year... ok at least I'll try!

And here she is!

AF is here, and welcome!!!

My sister said she's never seem someone so happy to get their period :)

My nurse co-ordinator told me that we would probably do a standard 17-day BCP down regulation cycle. But as the clinic closed yesterday, and my appointment with my nurse is on Jan 7 (2 days after clinic reopens), she said that if I end up being on the BCP for a few extra days, it won't make any difference at all. And since I got AF today, that makes for an 18-day BCP course.

Almost perfect timing, I'm so happy!!!

Plus, I had thought that she might hold off and then come along on Christmas Eve, which woulda sucked a bit, but now she'll have been and gone by then, so even better I say!!!

Just feels so good to finally be getting started. This last 4 years has been a really long time.



I remembered about a week ago, that back when I fell pregnant the first time, I had my Tarot cards read. At the time I thought it was strange that the girl didn't pick up on the fact that I was pregnant, although when I later found out that the pregnancy had miscarried at about 5 weeks and I was merely the proud carrier of an empty gestational sac, that made far more sense.

Anyway, that pregnancy was due in September. And the Tarot reader told me that my first born would be a girl, and that she would be a Libran. Libra covers a bit of September, and about 3 weeks of October. So of course, I had assumed that she was talking about my current pregnancy, and thought nothing more of it.

But then it popped into my mind again recently, I don't know why. I calculated that if this cycle works, our baby would be due in October... Coincidence? I hope not....

Waiting.

I hate waiting.

I've run out of appointments.

Just waiting for Flo.



I picked up my script of BCP the other day. How fun. The pharmacy girl asked me if I'd taken it before, and altho I've taken a BCP before (afew years ago now), I hadn't taken that particular one, so I answered "No." So she screamed out to the pharmacist to come and talk to me. I've realised now, the correct answer to the question, would have been "Yes."

I explained to the pharmacist that I'd taken the pill before, just not this particular one. Then he asked me if I was taking it as a contraceptive, or for something else. I must say I was suprised by the question, I thought all 'regular' people took the BCP to prevent pregnancies. I stated that it was for IVF. He decided that my doctor would have already told me more about this BCP than what he could, and as I didn't have any questions, he happily disappeared again.

I couldn't help but feel then that the pharmacy girl was judging me. She probably wasn't, but having my IF 'out there' hardly makes me feel warm and comfortable.

So now I have my BCP tucked away in the cupboard waiting.

CD27.

I feel kinda irritable and a little bitchy today. Which could be the lack of sleep last night, and the bit of christmas shopping that I threw in after work. Or maybe.....


I asked DH if I could be bitchy to him for a while, just to get him used to it for next month :) Sadly, he declined my kind offer. He is convinced that I will be one of those people who is unaffected by hormones... Hmmm...


Ooh in unrelated news, I have decided that I love love love giving presents to people. But I totally hate shopping. People are so rude, I get irritated as soon as I get to the shopping centre, and that does not make for an enjoyable shopping trip!!

Ready for action

OK I think we are officially ready to start treatment!!!

I asked D if he was ready, and he said "Bring It ON!" so I guess we are ready! lol

Tonight was our final appointment before it's time for AF and BCP. My BBT tells me that I ovulated a few days ago, back into the swing of my Day 14 ovulation, so hopefully that means I'm back to a 28 or 30 day cycle, and AF will arrive pre-Christmas.... fingers crossed, cos really, every day counts for me!!! Let's get this show on the road!!!!

We went in to the clinic tonight for a "First Cycle Seminar", with all the other newbies that are about to embark on their IVF Journeys. I had thought it would be a somewhat smaller group, as they run these sessions every week, and that maybe we could find some 'cycle buddies' to befriend. But alas, there were about 15 couples there, and nobody was chatty, or even sat next to any other couples really!! There were spare seats between each couple!

We covered a lot of ground that I already knew (actually crossed my mind that maybe I'm too much of an expert on contraceptive pill down regulation cycles, and I haven't even started yet. I have, however, studied the website, been to another seminar, studied the handbooks, and chatted to a friend of mine who has been through a stimulated cycle.) It was all presented by the head of the Nursing Staff at the clinic, and she was fabulous. Very informative, friendly and approachable. She went through how the cycle works, when you have to take the meds etc, all of which I've been through before.

We got a little bag of goodies to play with and look at. D was repulsed by the progesterone pessary, which I found quite amusing :) We all got out of Gonal-F demo pens, and a piece of fake stomach, and the Nurse said that she was assuming the guys were all gonna do the injections, and pretty much all the guys nodded. No way jose!! D is not doing mine. It's such a teeny little needle, so easy to use! Makes me feel like a diabetic actually, it's so similar to an insulin needle. I'm suprised more chicks weren't gonna do their own injections. I asked D if he wanted to play with the pen and the fake stomach fat, but he's not interested. I told him that I'd prefer to do it myself, and if the trigger is an intramuscular injection, I know plenty of nurses who have offered to take care of that one for me too. So, no deal on the D doing injections. No Sir.

At the end of the session, everyone cleared out pretty quickly. We hung back so that I could ask a quick question about what payment methods are acceptable for my appointment in Jan when I pick up my goodies and hand over a large sum of money.

Apparently Australia is probably the best place in the world to get IVF, as far as money is concerned. Most of the meds are actually covered by the government (except for the Synarel) and we have a fab government health care scheme, which will refund a couple thousand dollars back to us after we've made the upfront payment. The nurse said that couples come over to Australia from Asia and other countries some time, just to have their IVF, and then go back home to see out their pregnancy and have their babies.

You may want to look away if you're American, cos I'm gonna tell you how much we're paying for our treatment.... It's about $4600 upfront. That includes most meds. My health insurance covers us for 100% of my day surgery for ER. And then the government gives us back about $2000 or so. Lucky, huh?!? Of course we have to pay for our clinic visits, ultrasounds, blood tests etc separately, but I still think we get a great deal over here!!!


So that's it for appointments!!

Ready to roll....

Quiet week

In my wonderful scheduling of one appointment a week, in my efforts to keep the year rolling along, I managed to schedule none this week... so it's kinda quiet on the IF front. Actually I had thought that after my RE appt last week, there mighta been some more to schedule, but no! We've apparently completed all of our workup, so nothing new. Hmmm. And then only one appointment next week, and I'm done until Jan 7!

Had the worst shift ever on Monday. Seriously. About half way through it I already awarded it that title, but it didn't get any better!! (I work as an Associate Nurse Unit Manager of a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit - that means I'm the boss of the shift, looking after babies on life support) I'm not gonna go into it cos I really don't want to relive it again, but some highlights included admitting 4 babies onto life support, personally assisting with 2 intubations, one pulmonary hemorrhage successfully resuscitated, cardiac massage on another little treasure, and personally attending the delivery of a 29 week baby, because I had no staff left that were free to attend it!!! Aaaargghhhh!! That is by far the closest that I have come to having a meltdown at work.

In conclusion, there is no way that I want to have to deal with a shift like that around ER etc, (not just because of the sick babies, but the stress was phenomenal!) so as soon as I get to work today, I'm planning to put in an annual leave application for one of the first weeks in Feb, and hope that my timing is about right!!!!

A brief thought...

Last night at netball (I play mixed netball twice a week) we got a new fixture for our Sunday night team. Our last game for the year is December 14, and next year's first game is Feb 1. My friend K excitedly pointed out to me that December 14 might be my last game for a long time.... exciting, no?